Saturday, 5 April 2014

Memoirs of a Dragonborn Log 14

Log 14

Its taken nearly six days, a couple of bears, half a dozen dead bandits and several romps in the grass, but we've made it to the Nightgate inn, with just one day to spare  before Kharjo and the gang left for the cave. After a brief rest and wash up we all met in the bar for an update on where the hell we were going. Dimhollow, (sounds like a tomb to me) and then Mjarr insisted we play drinking games. We were doing fine with that, until Fenwitt suggested Noggin Topper. Its big in Solitude. For those of you that don't know it, let me explain the rules:

1.Get a round in as per normal but include a bottle of something that takes away the power of speech, preferably Calovian brandy or Blackbrier is good. This is called the Topper.
2.Find yourselves a table and sit down, your going to need it. Place a shot class on the neck of the Topper and place it at the centre of the table,and....
3. ....Make sure at least one of you has some restoration salts ready for the morning after.

Now keep an eye on the rest of the patrons. If a soldier walks in they become the Noggin and the aim is to be the first one to shout Noggin and point at one of your group of drinking buddies. Aim for the light weight in the group. You are now the Spotter and get to take half a shot from the Topper, your designated buddy becomes the Dropper, has to shout Noggin Topper and salute the soldier before taken a full shot from the Topper him/herself, and Whom ever takes the last shot from the Topper buys the next bottle. The game is adaptable to the environment so if your in winterhold the Noggin would be a Stormcloak or any other city guard depending on where you are at the time.
If there is a shortage of soldiers or you just want the Topper to empty quicker you can have as many different Noggins as you want.  For example, if you want to rib the wealthy patrons who enter, just shout Toffee/Toffee Hoffer, Farmers are Veggi/Veggi Pullers and hot people are Hubber/Hubber FubRub.

Here's a list of the ones i know.


Noggin Topper
Salute the soldier

Veggi Puller
Thumbs up
Eye Candy
Hubber  FubRub
Any sexual gesture acceptable
Vulkha Polka
Both palms outward- use this one with caution
Pond Gulper
Mime the breaststroke
Kitty Litter
Mime washing ear with paw- Kharjo hates this one

Scum Puncher
Raised fist
Everyone shouts Malacath – its customary to throw peanuts if you have any
Check your pockets
Check your pockets- No seriously, check them
Vengence Verdi
Thumb in each ear and waggle your fingers
Wingardium Leviossa
This can also be used for Witches and Necros in the unlikely event that they show up. Do the actions we all know this.
Anyone with a pet
Wagger Dragger
Spam someone in the game
Kill Frenzy
Doesn't happen very often but If anyone does manage to kill them with a projectile, everyone ells clockwise from the killer has to take a whole shot. Warning: Drinking games and projectiles are dangerous lol.

If the game is slow you can add as many Noggins as you need to make the game more exciting, or even make up some of your own. If the Dropper hesitates to respond to the shout of the Spotter, or their response is incorrect (this happens more frequently as the evening moves on), they must down their shot and receive a forfeit from the rest of the group. These can vary in the level of embarrassment. If anyone is asleep, unconscious or otherwise ignorant of their surroundings, it is traditional to perform japes, for examples, you can graffiti their faces with charcoal, tie their boot laces together and scream Bandit in their ears (my personal favorite), or take them to their room, put them to bed naked, and then carry their bed out and place it in the street with a sign on it that says 5GP per shag, where they can wake up to find a goat laying next to them and the locals having  a bloody good laugh at the their expense. After Id covered myself up with a blanket, some of the lovely bar staff helped me put my bed back in my room and then Elennor put me back in my bed...mmm, warm and comfy.

Some of the helpful staff at the Nightgate Inn

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